026_THE GAP

Money is just a symbol for something. Very powerful, I think the most powerful so far… but still – just a symbol.
When I hear the word “money” I automatically start thinking what’s this symbol about (which simply means - I am afraid of this symbol! Afraid if I have money or not! Afraid, as long as I don’t know what I want to do with this money)

But enough of my ball and chain and back to our civilization's balls in chains!
For the time being this symbol suits us perfectly!
Until we figure out what is it that we want (I mean what we truly WANT) the symbol remains strong – in us!
So, we believe everything will be ok again as soon as we are back on our way as before. When our past habits return and everything is back as it was, we’ll be alright. I mean we’ll be poor and rich…. something we know a lot about. On both sides of this division (gap, cause the GAP it is!)

The ones without any money envy those with money! Which is alright bc we can deal with it. Even when we can't deal with this – we envy! And we can deal with envy or think we can.

As long as this symbol money represents remains strong, we will know how to deal with life. But what if…?

So, we support it. We think… better support it! In any way, we can.

We bail the banks, we’ll do anything to keep this symbol strong. Money is the one symbol we care to keep strong.
If it’s weak we “heal” it. We do it in the most incredible ways.
We create victims that will pay the price (with death and misfortune, losing their pensions and homes and their savings) so we can save our “weak” god – money!
We have to have it strong! God cannot be weak…. (fuck, My God is weak… that’s why I love Him! He is like me).

We are saving god-money!
It means sacrificing some, perhaps even many in the name of this god we need so strong and powerful and almighty (everything that My God isn’t, btw! Everything that I am not! I believe, humanity is like me).

All to keep this god alive!

I was thinking - even the thieves are somewhat honest. Or they'd like to be.
They don’t steal money because they want to keep stealing for the rest of their lives. They steal it to become normal, respectable, honest!
They dream of going straight. They want to be straight and honest. Or they would "steal" a cab fare by not paying this service when they need it. 

No! They want to be like everybody else and pay for it like everybody else! Like any average, honest citizen.
 They want to buy a car, not steal it! Even when they steal cars for living… they are after money that will make them “honest” because they will buy things with the money!

They want to buy all this as any other rich person does.
So - they steal money. Money makes you honest!
Symbols make people honest in a symbolic (not real) ways.

So, this symbol perfectly satisfies us until it remains strong. So we keep it strong for costs. Whatever it needs – we will do it! There is no other God – is there!
Or is there?
It's all about money anyway.

The truth is somewhat different. When we invest in something, we ALWAYS invest emotions.
Even when it comes down to “it’s only money”, it’s not money – it’s EMOTIONS. WE invest emotions.
In the USA you have a wonderful phrase: put your money where your mouth is.
The rest of the world doesn’t have even that. You probably don’t know what I mean here but if you lived in the world of institutionalized LIE for so many years, you would know too! 
It's called - socialism! Socialism is a planned production of deficiency to enable the regime to re-distribute "poverty" in the way it sees fit.

Things cannot be resolved on a symbolic level!

Symbols are merely masks of our reality; they lie to us, deceive us, guide us in wrong directions – that’s why we create them and that’s why we support symbols. When they become weak we intensify our “religion” and allegiance to our symbols. We find it only natural.

Symbols must be resolved and clarified in a way that connects us to the Beginning when they started!
 When symbols were formed.

They must lead us back to our Origin, where the “real” was swapped for symbolic and got lost (the forgotten or lost Pain of denial!). I believe that we needed a BODY to recall everything we had once lost, mostly the ability to learn about us!. Now we have it. We have a body.

We were then confounded by symbols and we found the Real to be a bit too real for us to carry!
We were kids, for god’s sake!!!

That’s when we stopped trusting our First Parents.
Who didn't have the parents of their own to teach them!

I remember the exact moment this happened to me here with my parents. I questioned myself now, as a grown person, what happened to me as a baby in yet non-verbal stage of life. Why and when I stopped trusting (believing in everything she says or does) my mother?
It had to do with shit (which in my mind is the symbol for money).

I was freshly bathed, cleanly washed, and – naked! (naked means no symbols on me). She put clean me in the middle of a snow-white clean sheet on the double bed!
I was in the middle of it, happy, screaming with joy.
FREEDOM was intoxicating, I felt HAPPY, freedom exploded in me…. so relaxing….
And then I defecated.
I shit on this clean, vast, white surface! Leaving my mark in the Universe!

I produced a wonderful, powerful proof of my health, living steaming proof of my strength, my productivity, my creativity, my talent….

I was proud! I wanted to say: Look mommy – look at me! Look what I have done….

But she was angry. I could see it in her face and I didn’t know why! Why couldn’t she share my happiness?!
That was the moment the gap between me and her was created.

I didn’t understand why. Hell, on her side of truth this meant cleaning it all up – again!
Repeating the job (she probably had other things to do). But for me, it meant: well, I see she doesn’t appreciate me…
she doesn’t want me to be happy….
So there is something wrong with her (not me, hell – no! I am HAPPY…. How could that be wrong?!)

 In my mind it imprinted this:
the grownups think (feel) differently than I feel (and then think).
I cannot trust them all the time. So, I will have to save some of my memories and wait for a better moment. When I grow up I’ll understand how they think (feel). (I learned they think, not feel!).

The good side of it is – I then became dual!
I kept with me the thinking and the feeling part of me.  Practically I started taking care of me, while the expressing part of me was an act that others would accept. I took good care of me. Only I knew that I have a child inside and that I couldn’t live without it if I gave him up like others do. Never met anyone talking about inner child til much, much later on!

In short: I kept my shit together!

The symbolic life means a relationship that has not evolved.
Since this relationship never happened it was replaced by its symbol. Symbols have symbolic reactions and people deal with it because they can learn it. So they don’t get punished!

The real self they keep inside until it is no longer theirs. That’s the GAP.
A direct relationship is being replaced by symbolic expression.
Nobody seems to miss true relationships because it seems it is easier to live a sYmbolic life on the symbolic level. The relationship we needed never happened, it just wasn't there!

For some reason, the normal response to the stimulus and normal expressions were suppressed. It became unimportant.
Never developed! So – WE never developed fully. This would otherwise come naturally, to react fully and truthfully…  and it would be logical as a response, appropriate.
The communication should be normal and our speech would be truthful, no lies involved!
So why did the usual communication changed to a symbolic one?
That's what we have to be interested in!

In an individual, the cause of this anomaly is traumas from our childhood! In mankind, it is the interrupted dialog with our God, Creator(s), First Dad and Mom!

The word religion implies to "religare".
In Latin: to tie, fasten. 
RUOW terminology says: healing the GAP!
But first, we need to trust the One on the other side of the gap. And the one on this side of the gap as well where we are!